Breastfeeding: the trick to a comfy latch. Decide on a small circle of people that you feel comfortable touching or being near your newborn, suggests Dr. Ahmed. I personally think you are overreacting. In a, I think it's a little weird that you asked to hold it. PH: (01) 6489130, Lo-Call 1890 208 080 or email: info@presscouncil.ie. Here they are: It can be hard to keep family and friends away who are clamoring to cuddle your baby. The lucky ones even get paidparental leave. Its understandable that everyone wants to visit and see your baby, says Dr. Schaffner. No parents, no friends, no visitors. Newborns should not go more than about 4-5 hours without feeding. "Look at her wearing pants underneath a nightgown," said with small chuckle. "Ideally, it. Grandparents are not allowed to spend all their time staring at the baby. policy. If you unload the dishwasher but simply stack everything on the counter because you don't know where things go, that's not helpful. 24/06/2020 23:40. I don't want a sick baby. Try not to expose your newborn (less than one month of age) to more people than necessary, and avoid all people with infectious diseases like colds and the flu! should not be construed as a substitute for advice from a medical professional or health care provider. Side note- I have the same situation, I have one specific person who I don . Come up with a couple of general purpose lines to fob people off, and dont mind anyone who complains. Remember that older people may not have much strength, and children usually have no experience holding a baby. Baby wants to hold my hand to sleep. 6. Youre not being unreasonable at all. Newborns can sleep about 16 hours a day and sometimes more. My partner (M23) and I (F25) suffered two miscarriages before we had our child a couple of months ago. fever of 100.4 or more, they have to go to the hospital & get a I appreciated the messages of support, but I was hormonal, exhausted, and didnt feel like myself at all. Let us know anonymouslyin our survey hereand well put it to the real-life experts: your fellow mums and dads. my 2nd . Youre entering a new phase of your life, and its one of the most emotional experiences youll ever go through. You can obtain a copy of the Should I cut down on her baths. 4. Once you do put your baby down in the crib or bassinet, the next . But before you extend an invitation, you should try to hold off at least a month or more. Sitting on the hospital bed watching all these other people hold my daughter, I felt waves of sadness wash over me that I couldnt explain. Design: Ashley Britton/SheKnows. Bringing the mother a drink or snack (or fetching something else she needs) is always appreciated. Sohere's what you can say: "You're so sweet. Ive heard people say it but never truly understood it and now I do. For one thing, their partners are more likely to help out. We restricted visits initially. My first few weeks of life with my daughter were over, and I had spent them with other people. spinal tap (to rule out meningitis I think) - not something that I want While new babies are not as fragile as they may seem, you do want to ensure that they are held properly, particularly in the first few months of life. It doesn't cost a penny, but the payoffs can be enormous. However, since babies aren't fully vaccinated until after age 1, you'll also want to be extra vigilant to keep your baby from being exposed to germs, says Dr. Hasson. I missed my daughter, more than I had ever missed anyone and she was only a few feet away from me. Some new parents think that they want to be alone with their baby, but change their minds when faced with the reality of caring for a newborn. A newborns immune system is its strongest in that first week. Respond to crying. June 1, 2012 - first u/s, heartbeat 124 BPM!! Regardless, my own newborn-life experience is something I will make sure to remember the next time a friend or family member has a baby: Im going to back off for the first few weeks, and visit when theyre ready. "Parents are already experiencing so much stress bringing their newborn home," Soneji says. There is plenty of time for your baby to explore social situations in their own time and in their own way. It's raising a child with our amazing "village" and never putting them in compromising positions. Please be kind. They never mentioned the FLU/sickness etc.. Second to the "toy" folks, please read pos. For example, a young woman meets a man from a higher social class. In-laws may not see any reason to callyou are family after all, they think. Many grandparents are confused and hurt by these decisions. And if our parents would like to continue to clean and make us dinner, hey, I wouldnt say no. , A post shared by Jessica Booth (@jboothyy) on Jun 29, 2019 at 12:12pm PDT. Mariana Sifrit contracted viral meningitis . And since everyone has been waiting for this moment right along with you, theyre super excited to welcome you back home. Try not to let too many people handle your baby for too long, as he may get tired or become over-stimulated. The Journal supports the work of the Press Council of Ireland and the Office of the Press Indoor events with food and touching (let me bring you dinner and let's eat together while I hold your baby) carry a very high risk of transmission if someone is sick. Since newborns can't hold up their heads on their own, it's especially important that their heads are supported and their faces aren't trapped against any objects while they are held. Signs of infection in newborns include fever (over 100.4 degrees Farenheit), being too sleepy to feed, or a sudden change in behaviorall of which should be evaluated by a pediatrician immediately, says Dr. Hasson. Many times when I wanted to take her back people would tell me "but she's not crying." A baby crying is the last sign they give you to let you know they're in distress, uncomfortable or hungry. Regardless, only you get to decide what safety protocols to follow for keeping your newborn safe. What the mother and child need is peace. I love her so much that I cry when I look at her, I miss her when she is sitting across from me being held by someone else, and I would go through the pain of childbirth a hundred times over if it meant getting her. Show children how to support the head and neck. Some parents will be more than happy to hand off the baby for a while. Were very close with our families, and we wanted them nearby. Babies also grow quickly in the early months and they have very small stomachs. Now is the perfect time to start your Baby Registry! all my other kiddos were pass'a babies in family events. Grandparents must understand that these decisions aren't something that parents are doing to the grandparents. around. We are letting people hold Ryan, but if anyone so much as sniffles, they're not allowed. But months later, looking back on that time in my life, I do still wish that I had held back with the visitors. Scientists suspect that lack of bonding in human babies can cause similar problems. Am I wrong? Baby gate ideas help ! When we asked to hold him (baby) they just said no. Like she was afraid of all the Germs or something. "I don't think COVID-19 should be adding to their anxiety if they are taking the normal precautions such as masking, physical distancing and hand hygiene. The parents may be concerned that their housekeeping is not up to their usual standards. You can find out more about our use, change your default settings, and withdraw your consent at any time with effect for the future by visiting Cookies Settings, which can also be found in the footer of the site. As your baby grows, they'll gradually start to need fewer night feeds and will sleep for longer at night. http://s1187.photobucket.com/albums/z393/LindsayLooWho/?action=view. Helping outwith housework is important, but it can be tricky. Add in a pandemic and people who may want to visit. I offered to let my mom and mil hold him, but I also knew they were. 2. You know how it goes: Grandma has good intentions of loading the dishwasher or changing the sheets. But when everyone left, I felt a sense of relief to just be alone with my little, I thought maybe I would feel better when I was home, in a more comfortable setting, having spent a few days getting to know my daughter. Users are reminded that they are fully responsible for their own Also, ask anyone with a cold or other infection to wait to visit your baby until they are symptom-free, advises Dr. Hasson. My son and his wife are expecting a baby boy in two weeks the first grandchild on either side of the family. 2010-2023 Parenting.FirstCry.com. She wanted to be in the delivery room with me but I refused to let her, my husband said he'd keep her out of the room under the condition that she be the 1st person to hold the baby. It felt like heaven. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. There are no hard and fast rules about whether and when to let people touch or hold your newborn, saysAmina Ahmed, MD, professor of pediatric infectious diseases and immunology at Atrium Health Levine Children's Hospital. By the end of the first week of being home, my husband and I collapsed on the couch, exhausted, and decided we needed at least one day where it was just us and our daughter. The #1 app for tracking pregnancy and baby growth. I've also told people I don't want anybody kissing him. 24/06/2020 18:38 Can I have some yes we are no we're not responses please - Is anyone letting their extended family (baby's nans/grandads) hold their newborns / young babies and if so what precautions are you taking ? Required fields are marked *. It was the worst few days of our lives while he was in the NICU and I am terrified of him going back in the hospital. I think it's stupid to not let your parents hold your baby. Secondly, you can try swaddling your baby. What most new parents need is reassurance that they are doing the right thing, and that is something that grandparents can provide. Family members, never hold a newborn baby if the mother has not yet had the opportunity to do so after childbirth. Their feet should land on either side of your hand, angled closer to the ground so the baby is at a . One reason is that newborn babies are not tuned into day and night yet. The parents may be concerned about visitors bringing germs. I love her so much and I would do anything in the world for her. Aunts and uncles w. If any of my kids treated me like that I would be devastated. Germs stick to our clothes, so if they were just holding their own children, they may carry those germs on their clothes he says. Another complicating factor is if one grandparent is welcomed and another turned away. Your baby can see, including faces, large shapes, motion, and light. The bottom line. Am I being a bad parent by not letting other people hold my new baby? Its also advisable to know what potential illnesses are in not just your area, but the places that your visitors are traveling from, too. If you are lucky enough to have the chance to visit and bond with your newborn grandchild, try not to overlook the needs of the parents. The information on this website is of a general nature and available for educational purposes only and A new baby is most vulnerable during its first six weeks of life. Bringing a newborn baby home from the hospital is an exciting and stressful time. A newborns immune system is its strongest in that first week. Hip Hold. Its not as soon as you might think. Parenting.Firstcry.com accepts no liability for any errors, omissions or misrepresentations. When you visit the site, Dotdash Meredith and its partners may store or retrieve information on your browser, mostly in the form of cookies. Are doing the right thing, their partners are more likely to out! Something that grandparents can provide than happy to hand off the baby baby to explore social situations their... Social class can obtain a copy of the family strength, and we wanted them nearby or (... Post shared by Jessica Booth ( @ jboothyy ) on Jun 29, 2019 12:12pm. 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